women wisdom

In this job, you have to accept a huge number of invitation:
schools graduation ceremonies, wedding parties of some relative of a cousin of a colleague, also funerals, Hindu festivals, Buddhist mountain climbing, and thousand of lunches or dinners.

I don't know how to explain it, but you always feel uncomfortable.
Once they asked me to do a speech  during a wedding of which I've never met before the groom or the bride. Just because I'm the foreigner, the attraction. Inexplicably, you become the guest of honor wherever you go.
Just because you belong to that part of the world the majority of the people in developing countries thinks is all looking as Hollywood.
It's annoying that the only reason why they want you at their celebration is so vain.
Even if you stink, or you are a pervert, if you are the expat, you will be always invited.

A part of the speeches, and the fact they always serves you first, and they always try to make you TOO comfortable, in Tajikistan was an additional reason to feel bad about those dinners: women were not allowed in.
Once I was invited by Makhtob, a translator, a woman, at her place for dinner. And I didn't see her at all during the evening.
Women were in the other room preparing the dishes, and kids were sent to bring them. In the dining, only men.

I asked about where Makhtob were, and his uncle explain me the reason: "She's not allowed"
I said I had to go to bathroom, a declaration that always create panic in the room (will our inadequate toilet be enough adequate for a foreigner pee?), and I sneak out to find Makhtob, imagining her in a tiny, dark, cold room preparing food.

I found her. She was with other women in their own female party. They were laughing, joking, chatting, and preparing the plate. When  she saw me she was surprised: "What are you doing here?"
"Well, you invited me for dinner...And I didn't know you were not supposed to actually be in the dinner"
"I knows, this is how it works...That's why in Tajikistan, between women we say: If you do not want to see someone, invite him for dinner!"

I don't know if she actually ever realized her gaffe

All men

Like a man

In each project there is a component of gender.
Of course also for the water project.
Women are the one (and child also), fetching water, managing it at home, using it. For cooking, washing, cleaning, take care of babies and all.
A full time job.
So our duty is to stress the communities to bring the attention to the great value women have in the family economy and try to involve them in the decision making for the project activities.
At the end, they are the one fetching water, isn't it normal they discuss where the pipeline should actually pass by?
Isn't it one of the most important achievement to bring equity for all those women and girls not allowed to go to school, married as a child to old men, sold as prostitutes by fathers, killed while still in mother's belly because considered inferiors?

As I told you already, we were living in a camp in the savanna with a Masai community.
The chairman of the village was also the manager of the camp, Isaac a pure Masai. He was helped to go to school, to send his children to school, his community has benefited from all the projects on the NGO: water, renewable energy, agriculture and so on. They were our neighbors, we were living together, we shared food, water, space, drought and floods, elephant incursions, sad and happy moments.
There was also a volunteer in the camp, a girl, Beatrix.
One day she stumble on a root and felt down badly, injuring her ankle. So I gave her my super arnica liniment and she recovered in a blink of an aye.
Few days later, also the Isaac felt down, badly, and because he was wearing the Masai dress, a blanket passed over a shoulder and tied with a belt, he got all the haunch injured.
I wanted to offer him the same liniment and so I addressed him: "Hey Isaac! I want to give you something. Remember when Beatrix felt down the other day..."
Suddenly, offended, he stopped me: "Hey! She felt like a woman. I felt like a MAN".

After five years of gender oriented project.

the camp.